Who’s the boss?

How are decisions made in your house?

Our Experience

Last evening as Libby and I approached our house after a nice walk (lover temp and humidity) she told me that there were trees growing out of our front gutters. She counted six on one side and one that was over two feet tall on the other side. With my eyesight, or lack thereof, who knows when I might have ever noticed them. And apparently our neighbors are too kind to yell to me when they see me
mowing our yard, “Mark, do you know you have trees growing out of your gutter?” I am surprised that the HOA has not sent me a notice. So, imagine how happy I was today when a young man showed up at our door selling window washing and gutter cleaning. A miracle!

Lucky for him I had just walked in and was closest to the door as Libby was upstairs. I asked him how much and the price sounded reasonable although I was inclined to get another quote. But then he reduced the price. As we were standing in the front yard looking at the trees, I heard the front door opening. Libby was standing in the door looking like she wanted to have a private conversation.

“What’s going on, Mark?”

“I just contracted to have our gutters cleaned,” I announced.

I expected an affirming cheer.

“Can I speak to you for a moment,” she said quietly.

“Don’t worry, I got this.”

“I need to speak with you.”

So, no longer a man but an obedient child I excused myself to go in and be spoken to by Libby.

“This is probably a scam. Do you have any idea if this is a legitimate company.”

“Yes, it’s company name. And besides, I don’t have to pay anything until its done.”

Frustrated, she yielded with one final instruction. “Make sure you don’t give him any money today.”

When I came back in, I found her at her computer researching the company.

“At least it’s a legit company,” she said.

How would you process that experience in your marriage?

Could you talk about it without getting defensive or going on the attack?

Could you resist using it to criticize your whole marriage?

Could you laugh about it?

We did. Although she did pop me on the shoulder when she read one line. Guess which one?

How do you and your spouse make decisions?